How to be Happy Inside and Out?

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SUMMARY

There is a question on everyone’s mind - how to be happy.  I'm going to put a slightly different version of how to be happy out here for you. Because I don't really believe that it's necessary to be happy all the time. And I like to think of myself as a happy soul. But does that mean that I don't feel any other emotions? No, it doesn't mean that at all. It's not humanly possible for someone to be happy all the time. That's a myth. Because you are a complex human being with a very complex unconscious mind. And we live in very complex times. Instead of striving to be happy all the time and ignoring other emotions, the right thing to do is to feel every single emotion well, process through it and then go back to your default state, which is – Happy.

In this video, you will come across many tips on how to make happy your default state, how to continue being happy and you can even help your friends and family with this technique. Here is one tip – something everyone should remember. There is nothing outside of yourself that can make you happy. Happiness is generated within.

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Full Transcript of this Episode:

I'm Sirisha Ravuri. I am your online business consultant with a very unique mindset based approach. And I am here to answer the question how to be happy. Now I know it's a very, very difficult question to answer. So I'm going to attempt to answer it for you. This is something that you find so often, I mean, I have seen questions like this online, if I search how to be happy, there are so many videos out there on what true happiness is, how you can be happy all the time, I think you've seen a video, I've seen a video about how happiness is about the joy of giving. And there are so so many videos on YouTube, on Google, if you just Google it, you'll find it. There are podcasts on how to be happy, there's so much content out there on how to be happy.

Now, I'm going to put a slightly different version of how to be happy out here for you. Because I don't really believe that it's necessary to be happy all the time. And before I come to that, I want to tell you that if you look up my Instagram, my personal Instagram, which is @Sirisharavuri. Or if you go find me on Twitter, where I’m not very active, but it's still there. And sometimes I decide to tweet, so my Twitter bio, my Instagram bio, they have the word happy soul in it. And I like to think of myself as a happy soul. But does that mean that I don't feel any other emotions? No, it doesn't mean that. It doesn't mean that at all. In fact, there are times when I feel extremely low. There are times when I'm very upset. There are times when I'm very irritated. There are times when I'm scared. But I would still identify with myself as a happy soul. And I'll tell you why. It's not humanly possible for someone to be happy all the time. That's a myth. Because you are a complex human being with a very complex unconscious mind. And we live in very complex times. And in times like this, having the expectation that you have to be happy all the time, that you cannot sit with anger, sit with sadness, you can't get scared, you can't be irritated, you can't have low moments in life.

It's unreasonable to have such expectations from yourself and from others around you. Because as a person, you are an emotional being. There are multiple emotions that you feel there are multiple emotions that you have felt all your life. And these emotions shape you as a person. There are times when being angry is necessary. Let's say someone does something very insulting to you. It is a natural response to get angry. If someone breaks your heart, or if you see something that is heartbreaking, you see something that is sad happening to someone else, it is very natural to be sad, you cannot expect a person to be happy or bounce back immediately. So there are a lot of emotions that you must deal with. So the number one way to be happy is to get rid of this expectation that you have that you need to be happy all the time. That is a myth. Let's just crumple it up and throw it out there. We cannot be happy all the time. But what I can help you with is make happy your default state which means that no matter what emotion you experience, what emotion that is that you're feeling, you should be able to sort through it and then come back to being happy. Now that is something that is achievable, making happy your default state, which means on a regular basis, generally, when there isn't much chaos happening in your life, when there isn't a lot of madness happening, you are by default, a happy person that is possible. And how do you do that? You do that by understanding a very, very simple rule. There is nothing outside of yourself, that can make you happy. I'm going to repeat this, because it's extremely important that you understand this, there is nothing outside of yourself, that can make you truly happy. Now, true happiness, bliss is something that is spiritual. And I'm not going to touch on here in this particular talk. But I do want you to understand that apart from the spirituality of things, there is a possibility that you can keep yourself happy, as much as possible, keep yourself happy in your default mode.

And that is completely in your hands. Whether or not you have the right people around you, whether or not you have the opportunity to have pleasurable experiences, like going out eating good food, traveling, all of these things are memories, they do give you temporary happiness. But the moment you start relying on these things for happiness, you cannot be happy in your default state, then your default state is something else. And every time you have the possibility, the opportunity to go out and eat your favorite food, to travel, to spend time with your favorite person to watch your favorite movies. Those are the times that you're happy. And the moment that activity ends, your happiness ends. And that's not what we want. We don't want you do have a situation where you're continuously dependent on something or the other, for your happiness. And why is this important? Why is it important that happiness be your default state? It's important, because whatever is your default state, that determines how you interact with people in life, how you interact with situations in life. Now coming to business, if you're a business owner, and you have a lot of stress, or you have a lot of work, you have to deal with a lot of people you have clients to deal with, you have vendors to deal with you have your employees to deal with.

When you're dealing with people or situations. It's your default state that kicks in. And if your default state is frustration, or your default state is anger, or your default state the sadness that comes out in your conversations, that affects the decision making that you're capable of doing. It affects the tonality in which you speak to people. Because you need to remember this, when you're speaking with people, when you're interacting with anybody, when you need to influence anybody, whatever your state is, whatever your internal state is, that gets projected out to the other person and their unconscious mind grabs on to it. And because their unconscious mind is grabbing on to it, they start feeling the same things. And it's a very unconscious process. They don't realize that this is happening. And this when they start feeling it, let's say you're frustrated, you're speaking to a client, you're trying your best to mask your frustration. You're being polite, you're following all the rules that you need to when speaking with a client, but your default state is frustration. It comes out and guess what happens? Your client starts getting frustrated, and they don't even know why. And an entire frustration is directed towards you. So what is the state that you want your clients to be in?

What is the state that you want your employees to be in your vendors to be in your investors to be in if you want to pitch to someone, if they're in a happy state, the decisions are favorable to you. And that is the most important thing. And that comes out how your default state. So that's the reason that your default state needs How to Be happy. And when your default state is happy, you just go around having a more fulfilling life, you go around getting yeses from people, you go around achieving every goal that you want to achieve. So in short, being happy, helps you achieve your goals faster. It's as simple as that. So how do you make yourself a happy person, you figure out the thoughts that make you happy. You figure out the memories that make you happy. You figure out what exactly is it that keeps me in a joyful mood, of course, start doing more of what makes you happy. So that you're training yourself. It's very simple. It's as simple as maybe training your pet, or as simple as going out and doing your favorite things. Because every time you do something that you love, you're happy. But the moment you're done with it, your happiness vanishes.

How you train yourself to be happy, is by continuously doing things that make you happy and making your mode happy. And then there is a very specific way of anchoring happiness to you. So I'm going to give you a few ways that you can, of course, make happier default state. One of those ways, it might seem a little silly, but trust me on this and try it out. Every time you come across a mirror, I want you to look at it and smile at yourself. It's very simple. It's just a smile. Either a smile that is like this, a regular one, or a smile that shows your teeth. And that's all you need to do. Every time you look at a mirror, you come across a mirror of people into it, smile at yourself, move on, nobody needs to even notice. I want you to start smiling at yourself.

Just the action of smiling.

When you increase the number of times you smile in a day, it automatically signals to your brain that you're happy. And when you're doing something whether it is smiling or frowning, whichever it is, when you do more of it, your mind starts attracting more of it, your subconscious mind starts attracting more of it. We have spoken about the reticular activating system before it is when your brain searches for more things that are similar to what your focus is on and presents them to you. So, the more you smile, the more you will find reasons to smile. And that's the reason that I want you to do this task. Starting today. Starting now, every time you come across a mirror, looking to the mirror, and just smile at yourself. That is one thing I want you to do to help train your mind. Train yourself to make happy your default emotion. Another thing that I want you to do is an affirmation. It's a small short affirmation. I am a happy soul. That's all you need to do. You need to keep repeating this affirmation as many times as you can. But I'm going to give you a task for the next 15 days. Just 15 days, I want you to say I am a happy soul. Every day morning, when you wake up, I want you to say this to yourself 15 times and at night before you go to bed before you wind up for the day. I want you to say this to yourself 15 times. So, 15 times in the morning 15 times in the evening for 15 days. I want you to Repeat this affirmation. It would be amazing if you can also do this while standing in front of a mirror and smiling really, really wide and saying I am a happy soul. I said like you mean it.

So, to recap, I want you to understand that happiness This does not depend on something external. Happiness is all about what's inside you. So, it's only from inside that you can generate continuous continued happiness. And the second thing is every time you feel happy, see if you can find a way to anchor it. There is a video for that on our YouTube channel, which I'm linking in the description below, which I want you to definitely check out. Another one is smile at yourself every time you find a mirror to speak, when and smile to serve. And the last one is the affirmation. I am a happy soul. Say it as many times as possible, keep having that in your mind. But for the next 15 days, I want you to do it 15 times in the morning and 15 times in the evening. Alright, so that was it from me for today. And I will continue the series on happiness. So, stay tuned for that. Thank you